REVISIONIST GROUCHO-MARXISM

Ralph Dumain rdumain at igc.apc.org
Sun Jun 4 13:57:16 MDT 1995


GROUCHO-MARXISM FROM A LEFT-DEVIATIONIST REVISIONIST STANDPOINT

What, Alex dares to put the loathesome Bob Black on the same stage
with me?  I just wiped my ass with an anarchist.  Normally, the
very mention of 'Bob Black' makes me hurl, but this time I didn't
hurl.  Bob's act has some good jokes this time.  Loved that part
about insulting someone and picking their pocket.  The unity of
theory and practice -- great stuff.  Better than just direct
action.  I prefer erect action myself, but seriously, folks, Bob's
bushy-eyebrows shtick made me snap and snap.

But as a recovering semi-Trotskyite deviationist, I just couldn't
laugh at some of Bob's lines:

>Contemporary G-Marxists must resolutely denounce the imitative,
>vulgar "Marxism" of the Three Stooges, Monty Python, and Bugs
>Bunny.

What, the Trotsky-Bukharin gang all over again?  Shoot the mad
dogs!  Fellow travellers, what say you?

The Chicago surrealists are anarchists too, but they claim Bugs
Bunny as one of their own.

In comparison with the Marx Brothers, I would agree that the Three
Stooges are too much practice, too little theory.  Paul Buhle, on
the other hand, dubs this act "The Theater of Proletarian Cruelty"
and reminds us of Moe's class consciousness and anti-racism.  But
I dig Curly the most: he invented break-dancing.  Besides, the
best thing about The Three Stooges is that it is so militantly
lowbrow -- it's no-brow -- and its relentless shameless
infantilism is what makes it so irresistable.

Monthy Python?  I don't know.  I'm inclined to think the British
have too much starch in their genes, but often they use this trait
to great effect.  Besides, I never laughed as hard in my life as I
did in "Life of Brian", when Eric Idle as the Messiah is being
crucified, and he starts dancing on the cross and breaks into
song:

"..... Life's a piece o' shit ..... when you look at it .....
Sooooo, al-ways look on ... the bright ... side ... of life!"

-- and whistles a happy tune.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! Ohhhhhh-
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Woody Allen, Jules Feiffer?  Hey, white boy, there wouldn't be no
American left without the Jews.  And the blacks in the marxist
parties would have nobody to talk to.  CLR James used to ask his
fellow Trot intellectuals "who's your shrink?" to shut them up.
As for Woody, I thought he was a riot before his big
epistemological break.  Then he did Annie Hall (barf) and
Interiors (hurl) and ever since he got Serious, he's been a real
drag.  And Jules?  Jules did "Little Murders", foreseeing the
inevitable future of American civilization.

I threw rotten eggs at Bob for his cheap anarchist shots at the
dour Trots.  National Vulva is not the Trots' speed at all, you
adventurist tic.  All direct action and no talk, you aren't a
vanguard party animal, are you?  You've got to improve your lame
lines, my good man.  The Line, the Line, the Line is everything!
Don't you know anything about Trotskyism?  The correct line always
gets 'em in the end.

Not to mention your total ignorance of dorkalectical and
hysterical materialism.  Tighten up your act, bud.  You died in
paragraphs 7-10.  You've got to work on your technique and
practice your delivery, you subjectivist voluntarist spud.


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