humor in the "real existing socialism"

Bryan A. Alexander bnalexan at
Mon Oct 2 15:40:48 MDT 1995

Czech joke - In our great socialist nation, every birth is attended by
three benign spirits: one to bring intelligence, one for the gift
of integrity, and one who adds loyalty to the party.  However, since we have
not yet attained perfect socialism, our trains are often late;
consequently, only two of these three are actually present at the birth
of each Czech.  So every citizen is born with intelligence and loyalty to
the party - but no integrity; or integrity and loyalty to the party, but
no intelligence...etc...

	I asked for Bosnian jokes, but they were all too sad.  Here's
one: an Ustashe (Croat) returns home from Africa, showing off his
trophies to friends.  One sees an elephant head, asks "Where did this
come from?"  "Ah," replies the hunter, "from the Ivory Coast."  Another
spots a rare tiger pelt.  "Why did you shoot this one?  They're on the
verge of extinction!"  "Well," returns the Croat, "for the challenge of
the thing.  He was really quite fierce."  A third visitor glimpses the
severed head of a Muslim.  "Where did this come from?  Why on earth did
you shoot it?"  The Ustashe smiles proudly: "*That* one was special.  He
cried out 'No! Please don't kill me! I'm an unarmed civilian!'"

Bryan Alexander
Department of English
University of Michigan

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