SV: Hot from the Slavoj Zizek Masturbatorium

Anders Püschel ahp at
Sat Dec 18 15:20:32 MST 1999

I think it sounds like the kind of satire a porno (not pomo) magazine might
indulge in. It's virulently anti-serbian, though I couldn't help finding it a
little funny in spots (for example, the notion that taxi-drivers in Belgrade
have a degree in philosphy). Of course the premise that a Serb might receive
recognition in the center of the very world that is engaged in destroying his
country, is absurd. For instance, Spielberg would be more likely to make a film
about an Albanian.

Perhaps unlike some on this list I don't think that the serbs should be above
critisism, but any critisism - whether in the form of satire or more sincere
endeavours - should be footed in the realities of life in Serbia. For instance,
the virulent anti-moslem sentiments voiced in films and books.

Anders Püschel
ahp at

-----Ursprungligt meddelande-----
Från: * <yu217096 at>
Till: marxism at <marxism at>
Datum: den 18 december 1999 22:03
Ämne: Re: Hot from the Slavoj Zizek Masturbatorium

>Can someone explain this please.
>M A Jones wrote:
>> "Hoy, Dudes!!!!
>> Moy naim, iss Slavoj. I yam from big seeti, Belhgrad, you know? But now I hit
>> TAIM!!! Lekchurs!!! Gurls!!! Big pisstake of gobbliguk in New York Reviw of
>> big seminars in Oxford, Englund in big lekchur halls where gurls sittin wiv
>> legs akimbo, moufs agape, men, you wooden beleev!!! So fuckin EASY to score,
>> men!!!!!!
>> And not only LEKCHURS!!! Naow I yam to Hollyvut for Big taim PICTURE!!! Bruce
>> WILLIS goin to star in BIOPIC of OLE SLAVOJ, mi kamerardie!!!! This big
>> tell just to YOU!!! For your eyess ONLY, me leetle frend, you know why I
>> in you thiss way? Kos you leetle tiny helpless bug-eyed email freak, need a
>> help in your life or a jerkoff anyway,.
>> But first dere frend, I kees you and I tell you leetle somefink about life of
>> I born unt bred in old Belhgrad.
>> Iss verra beeg seeti, lotov nais gurls. I yam teksi-draiverr in Belhgrad. I
ken do
>> for you, WHATEVER!!! WHATEVER!!! you laik!
>>  Slavoj can fiks it!!!!
>> Nait-kloob, gurls, bit of snort, bitov smak, whatever, Slavoj fiksit. Kak we
>> No Problemo. Slavoj fiks everfink. Lotov sisters, big femili, me. And that's
>> ALL!!! Know wjat? We heckers in Belhgrad, we fiks the Net damn gut, during
>> leetl Kosovo misunderstanding we get Yanks to piss on Chinkie embassy real
>> good, we give Madeleine Albright big mustache on Foggy Bottom website,
>> we do anyfink Slobo want, cash transfer thru Bank of New York, we Belhgrad
>> heckers fiksit real gut, no fiks, no fee, get results. Now Chinese Peepl's
>> Republic gonna give $300 million to Slobo! Not bad!! Yeah!!!
>> So now we all famous dudes on Net!!!
>> Now like I say,  I yam even verry famous BIG guy in Hollyvut!! I get
>> Stephan Shpeelburg here, want to make nais film of Slavoj, I got nais
>> ten percent of action know what I mean??? And why? Why little Slavoj get alla
>> dis big pee-err?? Nuts about the NET!!! That's why! I run thees webpage,
>> I sign webpage SLAVOJ KISS YOU!!! unt you know WJAT???
>> You wooden BELIEVE, number of gurls who apply!!! Like I mean,, MILLIONS of
>> tasty, tender, just-basted, not so basted, whatevr, apply to Slavoj for
>> satisfaction, BIG KISSING unt no guilt, thassa main think!!! Nais leetle
>> Europeans, Japanese slitty-eyed gurls, Californian CHICKS (Wow, man!) unt
wjat I
>> gotta do??? THEN AGAIN, RUSSIAN chiks!!!!! Wow, check eet out, men!!! Juss
>> the gurls little bit Belhgrad NAITLIFE, leetle bit GREEK coffee, nais
>> brandy, and BUM-BUM!!! Give them little talk-talk, Linguaphone style, big
>> we talk UNTITTED NATIONS, we talk FILOSOPHIA, endocrinology, postmodernism,
>> like that, then we drive around leetle bit, inspect big linden trees, press
>> to bark, listen to sap rising, smell scent of nostalgic linden blossoms and
>> BINGO!!! Again BOOM-BOOM!!! know what I mean???? Talk a leetle bit more
>> (all Yugoslav teksi-driverss pass spercial state EXAMEN na filosophie, all
hev to
>> read little HEIDEGGER,  leetyl GEGEL, leetl SCHOPEHNAUER,  all that kinda
>> than agin BINGO!!! leetl bit KANT!!! Me, Slavoj, I bin studying KANT all my
>> know what I mean!!! I got so much time put in chekking out leetl bit Kraut
>> ding-an-sich here, leetl bit Yankee Kant there, ili Japanese Kant, post-kant,
>> whatever, all saim think, hear creaking of KNICKER-ELASTIC one more time,
>> ekshully, more CREAKING if MORE SYLLABLES PER WORD -- this
>> main lessom wjat I hev learnt, mi kamaradies, learn leetle bit howe to score
>> from OLD SLAVOJ!!! Talk more, fuck more!!
>> This main lessun of pomo lekchur circuit, men. Old Slavoj, he very
>> experienced TEKSI draiverr, teach you sometink SPERCIAL, men!!! even
>> post-propter-kant, (snachet, nazivayetsa, "sodomy" na angliskum, ie.,
>> epistemological subyekt exist prior to big dark obyekt boring into same from
>> behind, sneeki Berkeleyan surpise attack, but complate FAILURE know what I
>> mean!!!! Subyekt totally AWARE of same OBYEKT and NOT BLEIVE it is only
>> fantasmagoric product of leetl serbian grey cells working owvertaim -- But
also at
>> same time kompleet SUKSESS! Because by time SUBYEKT conscious again, whole
>> OK, iss enuf for now, mi kameradie. LISSEN UP Dudes!!! Slavoj gonna give big
>> LEKCHUR about CHAIRMAN MAO, you know why? Kos chairman Mao, he a big
>> pomo thinker before his taim, fuck thousands of dinky chinkies by means of
>> THOUGHTS which reduce all to silence of lowest common denominator of
>> IDENTITY politics which Chairman, Mao, he into in BEEG way.
>> Another thing: if you gonna add lotta syllables to words, gotta also make
>> each sentence into one BIG FUCKIN PARAGRAPH and then LEAVE OUT
>> PREDICATE or main verb anyway. This get them all to thinking you
>> leetle bit genius too, know what I mean????
>> Your pel
>> Slavoj

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