[Marxism] People say I'm crazy

Jurriaan Bendien andromeda246 at hetnet.nl
Thu May 6 04:59:17 MDT 2004

Doing what I'm doing. Unlike my brother, I have never been diagnosed
schizophrenic or manic depressive. At a certain stage, when the prurient
interest and meddling of stupid dorks in my private life drove me crazy and
I sought personal counselling, the psychiatric unit asked me instead to
explain what the problem really was and successively fed me Orap, Risperdal
and Zyprexa. The effect was almost nil except I felt sicker. All they really
discovered was a vulnerability that "could" lead to schizophrenia, and a
tendency towards paranoid mistrust. Good emotional control, and not fighting
against yourself, can be learnt and to a great extent you can teach yourself
also. I've made myself feel better and made progress when

(1) I released some emotional frustration and trauma through expressing it
in private (and very occasionally publicly),
(2) I mustered the will to make some changes in my lifestyle
(3) I returned to my own sense of responsibility and stopped believing
confused moralities about taking responsibility,
(4) I stopped dreaming in inappropriate contexts,
(5) I ordered my personal life more into a comprehensible pattern rather
than let things rot.
(6) I renegotiated some things in my relationship with the real world

I asked for and got a cure of antidepressants from a psychiatrist, it worked
much better. Best thing for depression I found is physical exercise, good
food, sufficient liquid throughput,  good breathing, not concentrating too
long on one thing or overworking, not smoking much of anything, a good fuck
(or at any rate receiving a genuine feeling of love), constructive outlets
for aggressive urges, reading or watching stuff that really interests you or
turns you on, an appropriate mix of being alone and being with people, kick
out arrogant prats trying to play parent etc. In my life I have tried to
take as few drugs of any kind as possible - what typically works best for me
is soluble aspirin, garlic, some dietary supplements to support certain
glands, sleeping pills, sometimes and charcoal tablets.

I can explain almost anything I have experienced without myth, but that is
not the point.


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