[Marxism] No Bush left unmarked

lshan lshan at bcn.net
Thu Aug 11 19:12:56 MDT 2005


Forwarded from a friend

Brian Shannon
________________

TESTS!!

In response to President Bush's Federal "No Child Left Behind Act" 
(NCLB), it is proposed that students will have to pass a test to be 
promoted to the next grade level. The new test will be called the 
Federal Arithmetic and Reading Test (FART). All students who cannot 
pass a FART in the second grade will be retested in grades 3, 4, and 5 
until they are capable of passing a FART with a score of 80%.

If a student does not successfully FART by grade 5, that student shall 
be placed in a separate English program known as the Special Mastery 
Elective for Learning Language (SMELL).

If, with this increased SMELL program, the students cannot pass the 
required FART test, he or she can still graduate to middle school by 
taking another one semester course in Comprehensive Reading and 
Arithmetic Preparation (CRAP)

If, by the age of fourteen, the student cannot FART, SMELL, or CRAP, he 
or she can earn promotion in an intensive one week seminar known as 
the>Preparatory Reading for Unprepared Nationally Exempted Students 
(PRUNES).

It is the opinion of the Department of Instruction for Public Schools 
(DIPS) that an intensive week of PRUNES will enable any student to 
FART, SMELL, or CRAP. This revised provision of the student component 
of the House Bill 101 should help "clear the air" as part of the "No 
School Left Standing"





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